Practical Poly Perspectives

Mankind is polyamorous by nature. The idea of monogamy is an invention of the church that is reinforced by the belief that by denying such a primal and natural way of life…we are somehow better people. The ability to only have a sexual relationship with a single person does not, in fact, make someone a better person. It merely makes them a person who has a sexual relationship with only one person. This is neither good nor bad. It just is. Any attempt to justify Mother Culture’s tripe about how it makes us better is futile and foolhardy. Why people have a hard time with this is a mystery to me. If a person is inclined to enter into a monogamous relationship, wonderful. If someone else is inclined to have more than one, wonderful.

One thing that this world is short of, and I’ve stated it before, is love. We all need more love in our lives. As long as there is honesty about the polyamorous nature when entering into a relationship, there is no wrong. There is no evil. There is no fault. It should be just as acceptable as an exclusively monogamous relationship. However, Mother Culture has determined that it is against what is right and good. She has decided to teach us that anyone who feels this way is somehow defective and in need of help. I cannot understand why it is so wrong to share something like that with anyone there is an attraction to if they are willing.

Now this does not mean that one should sleep around with anyone and everyone. Even I have been influenced by Mother Culture. My personal opinion is that if you have an attraction to someone and they do also, go for it. The attraction can be purely physical, but it will probably be a more moving experience if there are other feelings there beyond lust. This does not necessarily mean ‘true love’, but a love of some fashion. An example would be that my closest friends are all loved by me. It isn’t a romantic love that faery tales glorify. It is a love born of the deep care I have for those that are close to me. Some of these close friends are of the opposite sex and more than a little attractive. I would be willing to join in such activities with them if they wanted.

Now, the problem that some people have with that is it leads to a misguided conclusion that there must be strong romantic love involved. This is not only wrong, it’s naïve. Sexual intercourse can merely be for the enjoyment it brings. Trying to turn it into something it isn’t only causes problems. Don’t get me wrong. Sex can certainly be a sharing of an intense and deep romantic love between two people. It just isn’t always necessarily so.

On the other hand, some people are under the unfounded impression that anyone of a willingly polyamorous lifestyle is a harlot. This is just as naïve as someone believing sex leads to true love. Following Human Nature does not make someone less sophisticated or refined or socially acceptable. It just means they are in touch…and comfortable…with core impulses and feelings of Mankind. This is not the result of some degenerate strain of DNA or chemical imbalance. It is just Nature following itself. People can live happy lives and have meaningful romantic relationships while living a polyamorous lifestyle.

Living this way does not exclude the possibility of having a special relationship with someone, either. One can be more attracted romantically to a single person while have said relations with others. As long as that person understands and agrees, things can work out just fine. This doesn’t mean there won’t be problems…every relationship has them. There are couples that have been happily married for years yet live this lifestyle. They understand that just because there is attraction and possibly consummation with other people, it does not mean there is anything lacking in their relationship. It does not mean that they love their significant any less just because the did something enjoyable with someone else. It simply means that they enjoyed something nice with someone.

It will be a good day when Mankind finally figures out how to ignore Mother Culture and just get back in touch with instincts and intuitions. Our Race has a huge potential that was once utilized but now sits largely untapped because we have ‘advanced’. All we have done is trade a strong and deep source of knowledge and power for a quick and shallow power because it is easier. Actually…that can be its own rant on another day.

I don’t know why I felt the need to go on this little rant. I just dislike it when there are a whole different set of rules for those that are ‘different’ from the norm.

Categorized as rants

Liturgy and Aberrancy

Religion. It can be a touchy subject, especially to those who follow Pagan paths. I don’t know why it has become the standard to assume the pose of a misunderstood and abused soul simply because one chooses to look at things from a different perspective. It seems more than a little silly. If one were to step back an look, say, at both Judeo-Christian religions and Wicca and related Pagan beliefs then one would find a remarkable similarity. The differences really are not all that profound. In fact, they are laughably subtle in their own way.

Both sides have rituals and celebrations. A goodly number of the Christian holidays coincide with Pagan celebrations. It was a way to encourage the conversion of ‘heathens’ to the ‘true’ religion. Many of the rituals are formalized on both sides. There are certain prayers that should be said or certain actions that should take place depending on the particular day in question. Unfortunately, many of the rituals have become so commercialized that the true meaning of these days is now largely irrelevant. Pagan holidays have been fortunate enough through obscurity to maintain their original meanings. It is my belief that this lack of commercial sanitation is why Pagans revere and rejoice more sincerely during these times. It isn’t that Christians do not care or that they do not have the strength of faith. The problem is that Mother Culture has succeeded in slowly dulling the mind to the spiritual meanings behind the holidays.

Ceremonies exist in both paths. They range from weddings to funerals to regular congregations of rejoicing. Pagans for circles for most anything that fills their hearts with song and joy. Christians routinely attend church functions for the same reason. A marked difference is in the style. Many covens will create rituals for circling that have a deep meaning for that group. Church mass has been standardized like a public school test and is very much the same from coast to coast. This isn’t to say that one way is better or that there aren’t standard rituals for Pagans. I am merely pointing out that while the styles for these things are different, they are still the same at the core. The point of mass or a circle is to rejoice in the divine. It is to find that connection with something far wiser that our conscious selves and try to make ourselves better through that contact. This leads us to another similarity.

Both sides believe in divine power. A Christian believes in God and that all power comes from Him. A Pagan believes in the God and Goddess and that the power resides in us because we are of them. Both sides believe in the divine power, the difference is in where the divine resides. God resides in Heaven for Christians. The God and Goddess reside in everything and everyone for Pagans. Yes, I know that Christians believe God inhabits us all, but the popular view is that the majority of what makes up God is in some place that is separate from us on this world. Pagans have a more personal connection with divine power. It is within each and every one of us. We merely have to quiet our minds enough to touch it.

Both sides pray. We all do so in slightly different ways and for vastly different reasons. Take this example: If someone is extremely ill and in need of help to heal, a Christian will pray to God asking for Him to aid the person in their time of need. They will bend their thoughts and thus their will to the desire of that person getting better. If it happens, the God has been benevolent and has performed a miracle. A pagan will cast a circle, draw the energies from his surroundings, and send it to the person in need so that they can be healed. If it works, then the spell has been successful. What’s the real difference at the core of this? There isn’t one. A Christian’s prayer is merely a ritual used to channel the energy of the one praying to the one in need. The intent is to heal because that is what the prayer is about. That is what the will is forging with the energies. But a Christian does not accept the success or failure as his own. It is God’s will that must have that burden. One could argue that Pagans are vain and suffer from hubris. One could also argue that a Christian hides from responsibility by consciously accepting that it is not his will but God’s to save the person in need of help. I do not think either way is better…they both have faults.

Oh how Pagans love to wallow in martyrdom. It is a silly pastime and it serves no purpose. To be taken seriously, we should act serious. Save the performances for the stage. If you are that uncomfortable with the decision to follow an alternate religious path, you have some soul searching to do. It may be that you have some pretty significant doubts about the choice.

Christians on the other hand have a completely different set of issues. This constant badgering of people to convert is absurd. If a person is truly interested in finding a new way to worship, they will look for it. They will ask for it. If they don’t, then leave them alone. They obviously are not ready or not interested. Just learn to back off and wait. While you are at it, however, why not take a little time to find out the true Christian meanings for the holidays. Odds are they do not include buying larges amounts of things and covering them with bows and fancy paper or about dying eggs and hiding them. The true meanings of these days are much more moving.

Categorized as rants